These are not really talked about that much. You only see it in the news if a woman has killed her kids and the article will vaguely mention “postpartum depression” as the reason. It is difficult for our society to talk about a mother being mentally ill because she had children.
I have found a wonderful resource here in Miami, a postpartum support group run by a clinical psychologist, where it’s easier to talk about the struggles we go through as moms. I think moms are meant to be this cookie-cutter happy image that we see on TV, but the reality can be so much different. It often is for a lot of women!
I was able to admit I didn’t like my child in the beginning. I sometimes hate having the responsibility of caring for a child. I’m not ME anymore. I’m a mom.
The baby still only sleeps in two-hour stretches and I’ve started co-sleeping. I’d go crazy otherwise! I worry he’ll fall off the bed though.
I was diagnosed with postpartum depression and anxiety and I am back on Effexor (Venlafaxine) and at every visit my psychiatrist wants to raise the dosage. I fight back. I worry what it’ll do to the baby as I’m exclusively breastfeeding. He says very minute amounts go into the milk but I still worry.
My anxiety has hit the roof as I’ve told before. I had an episode of no sleep for almost four days when the baby came home from NICU. I struggle with insomnia on a daily basis. Going to sleep is scary! I am legitimately scared of falling asleep.
I’d recommend getting in touch with Postpartum International if you need support, seems like they’re a good resource for postpartum mood disorders.