New Year!

It is that time of the year again when new year’s resolutions are made, and people think more deeply about their lives and where they’re heading to (at least I do!)

I didn’t make any resolutions –  however I did make a long list of things I want to accomplish before my next birthday in November, so I have enough goals to try to get to in the next 11 months.

I had a good Christmas and a shitty New Year. Not going into it all but it’s just been a time of negative emotions and sadness and change. Maybe one day I can talk about it…..

Back to my shit job after a long break. I am determined to make a change this year – part of me wants to give up and just take time out and find peace of mind, but there also is a part that wants a new challenge and wants a better and more meaningful job and an opportunity to take on more responsibilities. Which part will win?

I do feel like I need a break. I want a time out! I have finally REALLY started communicating with my therapist (after a year!!) and I miss my sessions on the days I don’t have them. I have so much to say! Maybe one day I will go into the deep parts of my mind and start talking about the abuse, but I haven’t done so yet…..

It’ll come. I really want to make this therapy work and although I am very afraid of the unknown, I think it’ll be a huge benefit for me to explore the hidden memories and while I know it’ll be horrible to possibly remember the abuse and my childhood, maybe it’ll help me move on and live a better life in the future.

 

 

 

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